It’s been awhile since I’ve written but the search continues. I have had a busy couple of weeks and the sincere prayer has not always been accomplished. My goal was to do it in the morning after I got the big kids off to school and before I take the little one to preschool. I usually have a few minutes of quiet time when I’m finishing getting ready while the little ones are finishing breakfast.
Well, those few minutes haven’t always happened. Or they happened and I just forgot to read my book and pray.
So the other night I was thinking about how I hadn’t prayed that day, and how I needed to, but then I thought, “But I don’t want to read my book tonight when I’m getting ready for bed. It works so much better when I do it in the morning because that way I can have the things I’ve read on my mind all day and I can stick to a schedule.” I had almost talked myself out of it when I stopped and did the litmus test- was my reasoning deep and simple or shallow and complex?
Well, when you can answer yourself with a “DUH” then it’s pretty clear you have completely missed the deep and simple and embraced the shallow and complex. What was I even trying to do with that reasoning? It made no sense! Satan had successfully caused me to weave this peculiar complicated web of “structure” and “schedule” and “routine” and “order”over top of my need for prayer, which ended up completely obscuring my true purpose: PRAYER. Communing with my Father in Heaven. Which has nothing to do with a schedule, a perfect time, a particular place or method, because those are all shallow and complex. Prayer is DEEP and SIMPLE. It’s a ‘just do it’ kind of deal.
So I mentally conked myself in the head, went and knelt down next to my bed, read my book, and prayed. :-)